September 2011
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Sitting in a meeting and I’m dying laughing in front of...
– Text from my GBFF, Aaron.
True fucking story.
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My Weekend, In Photos.
Road trip to Columbus with my Mums
Shopping at Polaris Fashion Place
Shopping at Easton Town Center (TIFFANY & CO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!)
BD’s Mongolian BBQ
Hotel party at the Sheraton Suites in my hometown
Poppin’ Bottles, son!
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I got pretty drunk at Glory Days in Kent and took a video of myself singing TLC because I’m awesome, that’s why.
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Fuck you, Queen. Fuck rape, I’m dickin the handomeness dude, son! Church!...
– Drunk text from my best alcoholic friend, D.Stew.
He told me this morning that he doesn’t know what this means, or who he meant to send it to.
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HOW ABOUT NO.
Is this man really this fucking delusional to think that after this chain of events I would still want to talk/make sex with him.
Immediately after the first hook up, he told me that he may or may not have a kid and am I okay with that. (WTF!!!!!)
He ignored me at work the next day to try and make it seem like nothing happened to our co-workers. Despite the fact that our friends/co-workers know...
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My reputation is ruining my life...
They just hired a new guy at my work, he happens to be black. The first day I worked with him I had 4 separate people come up to me to tell me that people were taking bets on how long it would be before I fucked this guy.
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Cool things that this 26 year old women about town...
Going to lunch at Old Carolina BBQ Company (PULLED PORK SANDWICH MOTHERFUCKERS!!!!!!!!!!) with 3 of the 17 year old boys that I work with.
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I'm banging one of my coworkers on the low...
Deb: “Sorry, I didn’t realize what time it was. You can go on your break.”
Me: “Okay, Cool.”
Deb: “Can you just wait a sec so I can get (redacted) over here to get you off?”
Me: “Too Late.”
Deb: “What? Did you say something?”
Me:
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I hope there’s no after life! I hope there is no after life!
– Larry David to mourners, after getting kicked out of their Jewish funeral ceremony. (via whydoihaveablog)
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